Just Say It

 At ODT we coach men in becoming more effective in their lives.  We look to achieve tangible results in specific areas.  One area is in having a tough conversation.

The goal is to reach the point where someone else’s reaction to what you say (whether it be a compliment, idea, or concern)  does not dictate either:

* your mood

*your self worth

*or what you say next

Construction Men Comversation

The stance is “I am doing this because I want to and I think it is the right thing to do or say right now.”

And the feeling inside is “How you react will be interesting and filled with information…but it won’t hijack me. It’s you’re reaction, your stuff”

and “I am unattached to the outcome.  The outcome is not why I am doing it.  I own my stuff and you own yours”

Caroline Myss has a great quote about this , I paraphrase “Don’t bring you’re negative, fear based thoughts into my energized, positive and centered experience.”

Getting to this point is aided by various practices like Mindfulness, Meditation, NonViolent Communication, and others we work on at ODT.

If you are looking to become more effective in you’re life, I invite you to look over the Open, Deep and True Basic Course info below, and give me a call.

 

OPEN, DEEP and TRUE:

Basic Course

Men Stepping Into Their Awakened Power

A 4-month program for men

starting late spring 2014

This program is for you if you want to :

  • Grow out of limiting patterns and live a bigger life
  • Become bolder and bigger in your work and relationshipsmountain top

  • Drop the need to always be nice, and learn to show what you REALLY think… so people will respect you more

  • Get powerful tools to propel your growth

  • Bring more juice to your sex life and relationships

  • Stop tolerating your work life and start aligning with professional goals that matter

  • Follow through on your commitments instead of beating yourself up for not getting things done

  • Learn to get out of your own way and stop sabotaging yourself and the things you really want

  • Create a vision for the fulfilled life that YOU really want

Read men’s reactions to working with Tom Kelley:

“A true leader with passion and guidance. If you let Tom take you on a new path, you will not be disappointed. Tom’s guidance cannot be underestimated or overstated. He is both wise and humble. Someone who will challenge what you know and have you find new knowledge at every turn.”


“Through Tom’s guidance, I was able to learn the practice of being ‘present’. This practice enabled me to better understand what is ‘real’ and to see what is happening for the moment. It is with renewed eyes through this practice that I take with me daily. His guidance and purposeful topics of learning help one lean in to the passions of life. These are but some illustrations where his gifts of giving really shine.”
– Scott
Interior Designer
Nyack, NY

“Tom has been an amazing facilitator in the art of moving out of our comfort zones. I can tell you from personal experience his groups have been powerful forces to help me overcome the hidden obstacles to be more aware and reach for new experiences. He has a keen ability to understand and glean insights from our meetings that leave you wondering — ” Wow, I never thought of it that way”. To know Tom and be be part of his programs is the first step a man can take breaking out of our isolating, average existence and realize the innate awesomeness we have within.”
– Michael
Logistics Executive
Nairobi, Kenya

Men’s Coach Tom Kelley is leading men on an epic journey into their own essence:

ODT: Basic Course

a guided passage into expanded masculinity

a 4-month program for men

 

“Real power is evoked through authenticity, daily practice and purposeful action” Tom Kelley

 

ODT apply now green

FAQs

How does the program work?

It’s a four month-long program that takes place virtually, so you can take part from anywhere, so long as you have a phone and computer. We meet three times a month by phone — two training calls plus one group coaching call where you get live coaching, and support from other men in the program. You get recordings of all the calls, so it’s fine if you can’t be on all of them live (but I really encourage you to to get the full value of the program). We stay on track throughout the months with morning e-mails and the support of a private membership forum… AND to make it extra powerful, I’m adding in two bonus individual coaching sessions with just you and me.

  • Twice monthly, content-packed training calls with Tom

  • Monthly group coaching roundtable to get the individual and collective guidance and support you need

  • Downloadable recordings of every call

  • Access to a private membership forum

  • Morning jolt e-mails to keep you on track and accountable

  • Continuous e-mail coaching with Tom (a $2,000 value)

  • PLUS two bonus individual coaching sessions with Tom (a $500 value)

What kind of people do you work with? I’m not sure if I qualify.

raised-arms-cloudsI work with men who are ready to embark on a great adventure — who know there’s a lot more to life than they’ve been led to believe and than they have experienced so far. We’re taught to be stoic, to be the “in control” alpha male who just knows how to do everything.

It doesn’t matter what industry you work in or if your dream is different from the next guy’s. It doesn’t matter if you don’t KNOW what that dream is yet. This program is about opening up and stepping into a bigger version of yourself and realizing your own untapped potential.

The process starts when you decide to grow.

I think I should be able to do this all by myself…

Well, you will do it by yourself, but there’s no reason you can’t benefit from support, guidance and exposure to new ideas and tools along the way. The structure of this program and the support of a community are designed to propel you forward in a focused, deliberate way and that guidance is invaluable. Plus, we are taught all the time that as men we should just “know how to do everything” and we shouldn’t need to ask for help or admit that we are stuck. That’s one of the stories that keeps us frustrated and not moving forward. Which, if you’ve read this far down the page, you probably relate to!

 What qualifies you to be a men’s coach?

about tomI have facilitated transformational men’s groups for years in different settings and audiences–everything from corporate professionals to prison inmates. I’m a Compassionate Integration Counselor who has spent nine years studying and training under world-renowned healing arts pioneer, Tom Monte, and I bring my health coaching experience to the table as one of the many different modalities in my work.

I’ve spent a lot of my life in men’s arenas: sports teams, sales forces (both great and lousy ones), and even the military, where I was a Captain in the Marine Corps. So I’ve observed a lot of the major trends in manhood and seen how most men are taught to approach their lives. I recognize the feelings of frustration, shut-down and “is this really all there is”… and I know that there is so much more to be experienced when you make the decision to grow.

I became very ill in 2010 with aplastic anemia, a potentially fatal blood disease, and spent a month in complete isolation at Sloan Kettering Hospital. That experience of facing my own mortality brought home the knowledge that life is short and there’s no time to waste. I’ve done the work personally, going from being a pretty shut down jock and Marine to the men’s coach and mentor that I am today. I am committed to guiding men who are ready into an expanded, more authentic way of living and so if you think this work might be right for you, I look forward to talking to you.

Okay, I’m interested. How do I find out of this is right for me?

This program is application based. It’s important to find out whether you’re a good fit for the program and for the work before we move forward. To do that, click here to apply to the program by filling out a short set of questions and then book a 30-minute call with me. (There’s no cost to apply.)

 

ODT Apply Now orange

 

“Tom’s experience is a deep dive into the hearts, minds and spirits of ourselves and fellow men in a courageous but secure environment . . . ”
“If you ever felt as though your heart and spirit needed some housekeeping; grab a broom and some courage and head over to Tom’s men’s group . . . you’ll be surprised to find what you are really made of.”
– John
Financial Advisor
Fairfield , CT

 

What do you get when you combine a Marine, a highly intuitive and skilled counselor and a savvy about the “real word” guy who’s also a gifted health coach? Tom Kelley. I am deep in the world of healers, counselors, coaches, mentors, etc. And I have yet to meet someone like Tom who is truly a man among men and yet still can be with you about your most intimate challenges in life and inspire you to handle them gracefully and confidently. If you’re looking for a mentor, hire him. You’ll become the person you always knew you could be.”
– Karin Witzig Rozell
Founder, The Wellness Professional Network

ODT apply now green

 

 

Article written by

Please comment with your real name using good manners.

Leave a Reply